{"id":1053,"date":"2026-09-29T20:45:42","date_gmt":"2026-09-29T20:45:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2.jpg"},"modified":"2026-09-29T20:45:51","modified_gmt":"2026-09-29T20:45:51","slug":"ggtr-3","status":"inherit","type":"attachment","link":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/42-yasinda-dul-kaldim-benden-yasca-kucuk-koyun-erkegiyle\/ggtr-3\/","title":{"rendered":"42 ya\u015f\u0131nda dul kald\u0131m benden ya\u015f\u00e7a k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck k\u00f6y\u00fcn erke\u011fiyle.."},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"class_list":["post-1053","attachment","type-attachment","status-inherit","hentry"],"description":{"rendered":"<p class=\"attachment\"><a href='https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2.jpg'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"199\" src=\"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2-300x199.jpg\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2-300x199.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2-768x508.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2.jpg 784w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n"},"caption":{"rendered":"<p>42 YA\u015eINDA DUL KALDIM, BENDEN YA\u015e\u00c7A K\u00dc\u00c7\u00dcK K\u00d6Y\u00dcN ERKE\u011e\u0130YLE\u2026 \u0130LK KEZ YALNIZ KALDI\u011eIMIZ GECE BANA YILLARDIR K\u0130MSEN\u0130N S\u00d6YLEMED\u0130\u011e\u0130 O S\u00d6Z\u00dc S\u00d6YLED\u0130.<\/p>\n<p>Kocam\u0131 kaybetti\u011fimde k\u0131rk iki ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Yirmi y\u0131ll\u0131k evlili\u011fin ard\u0131ndan evin i\u00e7indeki sessizlik insana bazen \u00f6l\u00fcmden bile a\u011f\u0131r gelebiliyormu\u015f. Bunu o zaman \u00f6\u011frendim.<\/p>\n<p>Kocam k\u00f6t\u00fc bir adam de\u011fildi. \u00c7al\u0131\u015fkan, ailesine ba\u011fl\u0131, kendi h\u00e2linde biriydi. Fakat y\u0131llar ge\u00e7tik\u00e7e evlili\u011fimiz sevginin y\u00fcksek sesle s\u00f6ylendi\u011fi bir \u015fey olmaktan \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f, al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131klar\u0131n aras\u0131nda kaybolmu\u015ftu.<\/p>\n<p>Son y\u0131llarda ayn\u0131 yata\u011fa iki yabanc\u0131 gibi yat\u0131yor, sabahlar\u0131 birbirimize yaln\u0131zca yap\u0131lacak i\u015fleri s\u00f6yl\u00fcyorduk.<\/p>\n<p>Onu kaybetti\u011fimde yine de i\u00e7imde b\u00fcy\u00fck bir bo\u015fluk a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Bir y\u0131l boyunca neredeyse hi\u00e7 d\u0131\u015far\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kmad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>K\u00f6yde dul bir kad\u0131n olmak zaten yeterince zordu. \u0130nsanlar ne giydi\u011fine, kiminle konu\u015ftu\u011funa, pazara hangi saatte gitti\u011fine bile dikkat ediyordu.<\/p>\n<p>Ben de ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 \u00f6n\u00fcme e\u011fip ya\u015famaya al\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015ft\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Ta ki Baran kar\u015f\u0131 kom\u015fumuzun y\u0131llard\u0131r bo\u015f duran evine ta\u015f\u0131nana kadar.<\/p>\n<p>Baran otuz \u00fc\u00e7 ya\u015f\u0131ndayd\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Benden dokuz ya\u015f k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fckt\u00fc.<\/p>\n<p>Uzun boylu, geni\u015f omuzlu, g\u00fcne\u015fte \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmaktan teni koyula\u015fm\u0131\u015f bir adamd\u0131. Babas\u0131ndan kalan ceviz bah\u00e7elerini i\u015fletmek i\u00e7in y\u0131llar sonra k\u00f6ye d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc.<\/p>\n<p>Onu ilk g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcmde bah\u00e7enin duvar\u0131n\u0131 tamir ediyordu.<\/p>\n<p>Elindeki ta\u015flar\u0131 bir kenara b\u0131rak\u0131p bana bakt\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cG\u00fcnayd\u0131n, G\u00fclseren abla.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cG\u00fcnayd\u0131n.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 hemen \u00e7evirdim.<\/p>\n<p>Nedense onun bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131nda beni huzursuz eden bir \u015fey vard\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>K\u00f6t\u00fc anlamda de\u011fil.<\/p>\n<p>Tam tersine\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Uzun zamand\u0131r hi\u00e7 kimse bana kad\u0131n oldu\u011fumu hat\u0131rlatacak \u015fekilde bakmam\u0131\u015ft\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Baran birka\u00e7 hafta i\u00e7inde k\u00f6yde herkesle kayna\u015ft\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Benimle de.<\/p>\n<p>\u00d6nce bah\u00e7emin k\u0131r\u0131lan kap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 tamir etti.<\/p>\n<p>Sonra \u00e7at\u0131daki oluklar\u0131 temizledi.<\/p>\n<p>Bir g\u00fcn odunlar\u0131 ta\u015f\u0131maya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken elimden ald\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSen b\u0131rak, ben hallederim.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBen yapar\u0131m.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHer \u015feyi tek ba\u015f\u0131na yapmak zorunda de\u011filsin.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Bu c\u00fcmle beni oldu\u011fum yerde durdurdu.<\/p>\n<p>\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc y\u0131llard\u0131r tam olarak bunu yap\u0131yordum.<\/p>\n<p>Her \u015feyi tek ba\u015f\u0131ma.<\/p>\n<p>Baran odunlar\u0131 avluya dizerken onu kap\u0131n\u0131n kenar\u0131ndan izledim. G\u00f6mle\u011finin kollar\u0131n\u0131 dirseklerine kadar s\u0131vam\u0131\u015ft\u0131. \u00c7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken aln\u0131nda biriken teri koluyla siliyor, arada bana bak\u0131p g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcyordu.<\/p>\n<p>Bir ara g\u00f6z g\u00f6ze geldik.<\/p>\n<p>Bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 ka\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>O gece aynan\u0131n kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda uzun s\u00fcre kendime bakt\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Sa\u00e7lar\u0131m\u0131n aras\u0131nda birka\u00e7 beyaz tel vard\u0131. G\u00f6z kenarlar\u0131mda ince \u00e7izgiler belirmi\u015fti.<\/p>\n<p>Ama aynadaki kad\u0131n h\u00e2l\u00e2 bendim.<\/p>\n<p>\u00dcstelik ilk kez, y\u0131llar sonra, o kad\u0131n\u0131n tamamen kaybolmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyordum.<\/p>\n<p>Baran\u2019la yak\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z k\u00f6yde k\u0131sa s\u00fcrede fark edildi.<\/p>\n<p>Bakkala gitti\u011fimde iki kad\u0131n arkamdan f\u0131s\u0131lda\u015ft\u0131<\/p>\n"},"alt_text":"","media_type":"image","mime_type":"image\/jpeg","media_details":{"width":784,"height":519,"file":"2026\/09\/ggtr-2.jpg","filesize":395624,"sizes":{"medium":{"file":"ggtr-2-300x199.jpg","width":300,"height":199,"filesize":25377,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2-300x199.jpg"},"thumbnail":{"file":"ggtr-2-150x150.jpg","width":150,"height":150,"filesize":12197,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2-150x150.jpg"},"medium_large":{"file":"ggtr-2-768x508.jpg","width":768,"height":508,"filesize":105365,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2-768x508.jpg"},"full":{"file":"ggtr-2.jpg","width":784,"height":519,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2.jpg"}},"image_meta":{"aperture":"0","credit":"","camera":"","caption":"","created_timestamp":"0","copyright":"","focal_length":"0","iso":"0","shutter_speed":"0","title":"","orientation":"0","keywords":[],"alt":""}},"post":1052,"source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/ggtr-2.jpg","filename":"ggtr-2.jpg","filesize":395624,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1053","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/attachment"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1053"}],"wp:attached-to":[{"embeddable":true,"post_type":"post","id":1052,"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1052"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}