{"id":805,"date":"2026-09-23T20:22:44","date_gmt":"2026-09-23T20:22:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1.jpg"},"modified":"2026-09-23T20:23:05","modified_gmt":"2026-09-23T20:23:05","slug":"imgonlin1","status":"inherit","type":"attachment","link":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/kocamin-arkadasinin-benden-her-gun-istedigi-sey\/imgonlin1\/","title":{"rendered":"Kocam\u0131n Arkada\u015f\u0131n\u0131n Benden Her G\u00fcn \u0130stedi\u011fi \u015eey.."},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"class_list":["post-805","attachment","type-attachment","status-inherit","hentry"],"description":{"rendered":"<p class=\"attachment\"><a href='https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1.jpg'><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1-300x300.jpg\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1-768x768.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1.jpg 1024w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n"},"caption":{"rendered":"<p>Bir ak\u015fam sayfay\u0131 a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131mda Serhat\u2019\u0131n \u015fu c\u00fcmlesini g\u00f6rd\u00fcm:<\/p>\n<p>\u201c27 Mart. Levent\u2019e verdi\u011fim zarf h\u00e2l\u00e2 onda.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>C\u00fcmleyi okudu\u011fum anda telefonun di\u011fer ucunda uzun bir sessizlik oldu.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNe zarf\u0131?\u201d diye sordum.<\/p>\n<p>Levent hemen konuyu kapatt\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYar\u0131n konu\u015furuz.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ama ertesi g\u00fcn arad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda hi\u00e7bir \u015fey a\u00e7\u0131klamad\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Sadece yine ayn\u0131 \u015feyi s\u00f6yledi:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBug\u00fcnk\u00fc sayfay\u0131 oku.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Art\u0131k i\u00e7imde ku\u015fku b\u00fcy\u00fcyordu.<\/p>\n<p>Serhat benden ne saklam\u0131\u015ft\u0131?<\/p>\n<p>Levent ne biliyordu?<\/p>\n<p>Ve neden kocam \u00f6ld\u00fckten sonra her g\u00fcn o defteri okumam\u0131 istiyordu?<\/p>\n<p>Bir gece dayanamay\u0131p defterin ileri sayfalar\u0131n\u0131 kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131rmaya ba\u015flad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Aylar sonras\u0131na ait sayfalar\u0131n \u00e7o\u011fu bo\u015ftu.<\/p>\n<p>Ama sonlara do\u011fru birka\u00e7 sayfan\u0131n aras\u0131na k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir anahtar bantlanm\u0131\u015ft\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Alt\u0131nda Serhat\u2019\u0131n el yaz\u0131s\u0131yla tek c\u00fcmle vard\u0131:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cLevent s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc tutarsa Aylin bunu 40. g\u00fcn bulacak.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ellerim titremeye ba\u015flad\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Takvime bakt\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Serhat\u2019\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u00fcn \u00fczerinden tam otuz dokuz g\u00fcn ge\u00e7mi\u015fti.<\/p>\n<p>Ertesi ak\u015fam Levent arad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda telefonu a\u00e7ar a\u00e7maz sordum:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSerhat sana ne yapt\u0131rmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yor?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Sessizlik oldu.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDemek anahtar\u0131 buldun.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBana her \u015feyi anlat.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Levent derin bir nefes ald\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYar\u0131n sabah gelece\u011fim.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>O gece hi\u00e7 uyuyamad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Sabah dokuzda kap\u0131 \u00e7ald\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Levent\u2019in elinde eski, metal bir kutu vard\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Kutuyu mutfak masas\u0131n\u0131n \u00fczerine b\u0131rakt\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSerhat bunu yakla\u015f\u0131k bir y\u0131l \u00f6nce bana verdi.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBir y\u0131l \u00f6nce mi?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 sallad\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cKalp rahats\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 biliyordu.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Oldu\u011fum yerde donakald\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNe?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cDoktorlar ciddi oldu\u011funu s\u00f6ylemi\u015f. Ama seni korkutmak istememi\u015f. Tedavi g\u00f6r\u00fcyordu. Bana da bir g\u00fcn ba\u015f\u0131na bir \u015fey gelirse bu kutuyu k\u0131rk\u0131nc\u0131 g\u00fcn sana getirmemi s\u00f6yledi.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u00d6fkeyle aya\u011fa kalkt\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBana neden s\u00f6ylemedi?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201c\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc son aylar\u0131n\u0131 hastal\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnerek ge\u00e7irmeni istemedi\u011fini s\u00f6yledi.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>G\u00f6zlerim doldu.<\/p>\n<p>Levent siyah defteri i\u015faret etti.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cHer g\u00fcn sana o sayfalar\u0131 okutma fikri de onundu.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNeden?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Levent\u2019in g\u00f6zleri k\u0131zard\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u201c\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc seni tan\u0131yordu.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Anlamad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNe demek istiyorsun?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSerhat, \u00f6ld\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma odas\u0131n\u0131n kap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 kapataca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 biliyordu. E\u015fyalar\u0131na dokunmayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131, hatta o odadan ka\u00e7aca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6yledi. \u2018Aylin ac\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 i\u00e7ine g\u00f6mer,\u2019 dedi. \u2018Ona beni hat\u0131rlamak i\u00e7in bir sebep ver. Her g\u00fcn birka\u00e7 dakika bile olsa sesimi zihninde duysun.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n<p>G\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 tutamad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Masadaki metal kutuya bakt\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Anahtar\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kard\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Kilit a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u0130\u00e7inden banka evraklar\u0131, Arda i\u00e7in haz\u0131rlanm\u0131\u015f bir e\u011fitim hesab\u0131 ve birka\u00e7 dosya \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Ama en altta beyaz bir zarf vard\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>\u00dczerinde yaln\u0131zca:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAylin\u2019e.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>yaz\u0131yordu.<\/p>\n<p>Zarf\u0131 a\u00e7t\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Serhat\u2019\u0131n el yaz\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcr g\u00f6rmez ellerim titredi.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMadem bunu okuyorsun, Levent s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc tuttu.<\/p>\n<p>Muhtemelen bana \u00e7ok k\u0131zg\u0131ns\u0131n.<\/p>\n<p>Hakl\u0131s\u0131n.<\/p>\n<p>Sana hastal\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 s\u00f6ylemeliydim.<\/p>\n<p>Ama kalan zaman\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n hastane koridorlar\u0131ndan, korkudan ve geri say\u0131mdan ibaret olmas\u0131n\u0131 istemedim.<\/p>\n<p>Senden bir \u015fey rica edece\u011fim.<\/p>\n<p>Ben \u00f6ld\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm g\u00fcn senin hayat\u0131n da bitmesin.<\/p>\n<p>\u00c7al\u0131\u015fma odam\u0131 m\u00fcze yapma.<\/p>\n<p>K\u0131yafetlerimi y\u0131llarca dolapta saklamak zorunda hissetme.<\/p>\n<p>Arda g\u00fcld\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde su\u00e7luluk duyma.<\/p>\n<p>Bir g\u00fcn yeniden mutlu olursan beni unutmu\u015f olmayacaks\u0131n.<\/p>\n<p>\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc sevgi, birinin ard\u0131ndan hayat\u0131 durdurmak de\u011fildir.<\/p>\n<p>Onun sana b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00fczel \u015feylerle ya\u015famaya devam etmektir.<\/p>\n<p>Bir de Levent\u2019e k\u0131zma.<\/p>\n<p>Ona verdi\u011fim en zor g\u00f6rev buydu.<\/p>\n<p>Seni k\u0131rk g\u00fcn boyunca her ak\u015fam bana geri getirmek.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Mektubu g\u00f6\u011fs\u00fcme bast\u0131rd\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Uzun s\u00fcre a\u011flad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Sonra ilk kez Serhat\u2019\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcnden beri \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma odas\u0131n\u0131n perdesini a\u00e7t\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>G\u00fcne\u015f i\u00e7eri doldu.<\/p>\n<p>Masas\u0131n\u0131 toplamad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>E\u015fyalar\u0131n\u0131 da hemen kald\u0131rmad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Sadece pencereyi a\u00e7t\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>Ak\u015fam oldu\u011funda Levent telefon etmedi.<\/p>\n<p>\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc g\u00f6revi bitmi\u015fti.<\/p>\n<p>Ama ben saat 18.00\u2019de siyah defteri kendim a\u00e7t\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>O g\u00fcn\u00fcn sayfas\u0131nda Serhat\u2019\u0131n y\u0131llar \u00f6nce yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131 tek bir c\u00fcmle vard\u0131:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBug\u00fcn Aylin \u00e7ok g\u00fcld\u00fc. Umar\u0131m y\u0131llar sonra da b\u00f6yle g\u00fcler.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Defteri kapatt\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>O\u011flum Arda salondan bana seslendi.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAnne, d\u0131\u015far\u0131 \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p biraz y\u00fcr\u00fcyelim mi?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ayakkab\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131 giydim.<\/p>\n<p>Kap\u0131y\u0131 kapat\u0131rken ilk kez arkam\u0131 d\u00f6n\u00fcp eve bakmad\u0131m.<\/p>\n<p>\u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc o anda anlad\u0131m:<\/p>\n<p>Serhat bana k\u0131rk g\u00fcn boyunca ge\u00e7mi\u015fimizi hat\u0131rlatm\u0131\u015ft\u0131.<\/p>\n<p>Ama b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 son mesaj ge\u00e7mi\u015fte ya\u015famam i\u00e7in de\u011fildi.<\/p>\n<p>Bensiz de olsa ya\u015famaya devam et, diyebilmek i\u00e7indi.<\/p>\n"},"alt_text":"","media_type":"image","mime_type":"image\/jpeg","media_details":{"width":1024,"height":1024,"file":"2026\/09\/imgonlin1.jpg","filesize":67512,"sizes":{"medium":{"file":"imgonlin1-300x300.jpg","width":300,"height":300,"filesize":17549,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1-300x300.jpg"},"thumbnail":{"file":"imgonlin1-150x150.jpg","width":150,"height":150,"filesize":5555,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1-150x150.jpg"},"medium_large":{"file":"imgonlin1-768x768.jpg","width":768,"height":768,"filesize":86341,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1-768x768.jpg"},"full":{"file":"imgonlin1.jpg","width":1024,"height":1024,"mime_type":"image\/jpeg","source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1.jpg"}},"image_meta":{"aperture":"0","credit":"","camera":"","caption":"","created_timestamp":"0","copyright":"","focal_length":"0","iso":"0","shutter_speed":"0","title":"","orientation":"0","keywords":[],"alt":""}},"post":803,"source_url":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/09\/imgonlin1.jpg","filename":"imgonlin1.jpg","filesize":67512,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/805","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/attachment"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=805"}],"wp:attached-to":[{"embeddable":true,"post_type":"post","id":803,"href":"https:\/\/www.denizcakmak.com\/hbr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/803"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}